When we went swimming last weekend, I realised that my emergency-purchase Sports Direct swimming costume would not last me much longer. I wasn’t quite breaking any decency laws, but it was pulling me forward a bit so I was starting to look like a Hunchback of Notredame tribute act. A new one was called for and a bargain one found in the Debenhams sale.
This morning I peeled off the “for hygeine reasons…” label and took it for a test swim at the baths down the road from my mate’s house. This was a very straightforward pool, no moving floors, no changing villages, no fancy water features. Just a 25m pool with no nonsense white tiling and two diving boards (at 11′ 8” in the deep end, you don’t need adjustable floors…). Oh and some slightly scary sea creatures painted on the walls; a frog apparently joy riding on a jetski, a slightly stoned looking dolphin and (my favourite) a shark whose smile said “I want to be your friend”, but whose eyes said “I want to rip you limb from limb”.
I enjoyed a pleasant 22 lengths with breaks for socialising and the heightened danger that comes from having an aerial bombardment of small children diving fearlessly from the board.